kittyvillage

Daily Thots

2011-03-09T15:25:00.002+08:00

Marriage is abt 2 people with diff perspectives/expectations in life, trying to stay binded together for life. In reality, some marriages work perfectly fine, while others failed terribly. No matter what, both tried their best (or at least one party) to make the marriage work. If it fails, let go of each other in an amicable manner. Don't need to tear each other's face and hurt each other just bcos you deem that the marriage wasted your time. In the first place, you wanted to give it a try too didn't you? Then why blame it on others when it doesn't work? Have you thot abt why the marriage didn't work out? Was there any wrong on your part too? Don't always assume that all faults are caused by the other party and you're the victim out of it.

Some marriages happened bcos of certain unexpected circumstances. Everything happened for a reason. God won't put this person in your life if you weren't meant to be. It didn't work out bcos either one party didn't put in as much effort as the other.

Life takes it's toil on everyone. You were born with a brain for a reason. The brain wasn't left there inside your head for show. It's there for you to use it wisely to make right decisions.

Life is always about making the correct choice. Don't worry if you've made a wrong choice, as there're bound to be ways to salvage it.

Daily Thots

2011-01-08T22:21:00.003+08:00

Year 2011. A year which kicks off with lots of unhappiness. A year which kicks off with alot of sadness. A year which new things will begin. A year which new hurdles will begin as well.

Life has in store for me lotsa things I've nvr expected to get. Lotsa things I thank God for giving me yet pray that God will give me the utmost strength to fulfill it alone yet being successful.

Life indeed has alot of regrets. But since it has happened, what can I do except to move on alone strongly?

Yes, I'm very very sad and disappointed with my life. But can I end it all now? What are the possibilities of ending everything in d best way? There's no best way I supposed. Only look forward and pray that all will be well.

Daily Thots

2010-12-27T23:33:00.002+08:00

It's been awhile since I last blogged. Things happening again. The never-ending problems R's been giving me. All these years, however I've been treating him & his family, I've been kind. Yet now the table has been turned against me. Pack of lies, ugly side of human being revealed. Allegations, hidden truth, all because of his EGO at work. Where was the man I once knew? Gone...............

Is it true one gets nasty when u Leave him for a better future? Men.. Scary behavior.

Dear God, take over the situation. Do it Your way. Amen!

Daily Thots (190210, 1326hrs)

2010-02-19T12:56:00.002+08:00

Frenz come & go in ur life. They bcum so close to u tt u thot it was for real tt u've gt another true fren. But then when smtin happens & alot of secrets were revealed, u realised u were taken for a ride. *sigh*

Love comes quick & disappears w/o any notification. It hits u so fast tt u just simply get drunk over it & lose ur sanity. When u thot "Yeah baby, this is d one." The next moment u realised it, he's gone. Wooh! Hit & run accident again? *sigh*

Exams prepared, taken & failed. So its scientifically proven tt u're stupid & u're brainless. *sigh*

So much negative thots this CNY. Is d Tiger fighting against me? Hey! I wana be Lion King to rule over it. *roar*

I just wana b happy, tt's all I ask for.

Daily Thots (290110, 0850hrs)

2010-01-29T08:47:00.002+08:00

是不是我学会爱我自己，你就会多爱我一点？

Wads wrong?! (280110, 1600hrs)

2010-01-28T15:49:00.003+08:00

I feel so weak.. No strength to do anitink.. So moody..

I miss him so much.. Stupid me..

Oh God.. Help me.. I feel so lost now..

Ooh.. Suddenly d ofc sound so quiet thou thr r ppl walkin infront of my desk area.. Ppl tokin near my desk area.. But i hear nuttin @ all.. Wad is happenin?! So freaky!!

Heart beatin so fast.. Feelin so breathless.. Feelin so giddy.. Feelin so nausea.. Head havin thumpin pains again.. R these all real or am i imaginin things?? I'm breakin out in cold sweat.. So scary..

Wad is wrong wif me?!

270110, 1905hrs

2010-01-27T18:57:00.003+08:00

He loves someone who'll know how to love herself. I'm not the one cos I love him more than I love myself. Don't ask me why I love him so much cos I don't know. When I'm in a relationship, I give in my everything. I love him with my heart, not my mind.

You can say that I'm not sensible, so what? My love for him is not going to be affected by your opinions.

Anyway, everything is history Now. But I still love him alot and he'll always be in my heart. Memories will always be so sweet, so true. It's my lose, not his.

I love him and I miss him alot.

Daily Thots (260110, 2200hrs)

2010-01-26T21:51:00.002+08:00

Promises r meant to be kept or to be broken? Well.. It depends on who u promised.
Someone u love alot, u wont bear to break a single promise.
Someone u treat like a normal fren, u can heck care & break it.

Who is impt? Who is nt impt? So subjective ya?

Will u cherish d times we had spent together? Or was it juz another day in ur life, nuttin special abt it?

U left footprints in my life. Did I managed to leave my footprints in ur life?

Haiz....
It was nvr meant to be mine anyway. Y bother to tink?
Easier said than done. Gosh!

不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有。

So tired (260110, 1115hrs)

2010-01-26T11:07:00.002+08:00

I m a Christian. I gotta behave/live/talk like a Christian.

I m tired. So tired. Very tired. Extremely tired.

I wana let go of everything. There's no meaning to whatever I m doin nw.

Life....... I dun u'stan it & it doesnt belong to me.....

Change? (210110, 1320hrs)

2010-01-21T13:06:00.003+08:00

Wad does one mean when he/she says u're being paranoid? Is it a gd or bad sign? Under wad kinda circumstances will cause one to turn paranoid? Insecurity? Emotional instability? Hormones inbalanced? U tell me wad is it.

Everyday I'm gorging myself with food & I've really put on weight. But tt's beta then me nt eatin @ all, rite? Oh no... Wad have I changed to?
Haiz... From persistence became paranoid. I tink I'm gg crazy soon. I need a getaway.

Dear God,
I just want to have a normal & simple life. U've provided it, so don't take it away from me ok? This I ask from u daily in prayers faithfully. Thank u Father. Amen!

Daily Thots (200110, 1530hrs)

2010-01-20T15:24:00.002+08:00

It all started over d wkend.. I started gorging myself with food.. Lotsa food.. & a "little" alcohol involved.. Ahh.. Nw I look myself in d mirror.. Dammit!! I'm fat!! My face looks fat!! Ahh...!!!!

Ok.. Its either I eat or din eat.. Losing more wt definitely nt advisable.. So... Answer is.. Continue to eat laa.. Since everyone says I lool beta when I put on wt.. Hahaha...

I miss him.. Really miss him.. Haiz..

A Decision Has Been Made (160110, 515pm)

2010-01-16T17:03:00.002+08:00

Sittin here @ d hair salon wif my Dar.. Mixed feelins within.. Dunno wad to do wif myself.. F**k d whole thing & enjoy d process of it but gettin hurt @ d same time or wana juz end everything thou I'm so unwilling.. Luv hurts deep.. Iz a journey tt makes me lose my sanity.. I really wan it to b in sucha complete story in my life & nt another passin cloud.. Wth I'm tokin abt?

I hate this Grace..!! So pitiful as always & forever taken for granted.. Sucha dammit loser in life..!! Wad am I seekin for here??

Will life resume to normal w/o him? I hope I can pull thru it.. But most probably its gonna b a faker livin her life happily..
Life's a bitch!! F**k it!! Pui!!

I'm gonna miss him.. Miss all d things done wif him.. Miss everything abt him..
So... Can I stick to d decision made?? Its a mystery @ d moment..

Daily Thots (150110, 1430hrs)

2010-01-15T14:20:00.002+08:00

I'm so happy tdy.. Haven't seen my Dar for some time le then this morn he came over to meet me b4 I go off to work.. Instead of gg hme to slp.. He made his way over to my place just to see me.. So sweet.. Then he bought me kaya bread toast for bfast (thou I dun like kaya).. So loved lor.. I just wana be contented easily so tt I wont feel so terrible when he doesn't hab d time to acc me..

Tonite sec sch gathering.. Hw fun & Yes!! I'm d youngest!! Yipee!!!

Hmm.. Dunno if Dar will meet me tonite?? I miss him lots..

Daily Thots (140110, 1415hrs)

2010-01-14T14:03:00.002+08:00

Hmm.. Been days since I last blogged ah?? So bz wif workout classes.. Mebbe this is d best way to make myself too tired to tink of any other things @ d moment.. 逃兵 i call myself @ tis moment.. Haha.. Sigh..

No pt tinkin so much @ tis pt of time.. It'll nt chng anitink but perhaps made a wrong choice outta haste decision.. Wad m I tokin abt??.... God noes..

Ytd was ridin hme saw tis malay guy sms-in while ridin.. His is nt auto-bike lor.. We were ridin 90kmh & he was sms-in??!! OMG!! I dunno wad is in their cuckoo head.. So dangerous lor.. I immed rode infront of him in case he jam brake & cos me to kiss his "ass"..

Hmm.. Dar's so bz wif wrk recently.. We hardly tok also.. Nt to mention d fact we din c each other for sometime le.. Well.. He loves his job.. Gd thing abt it.. But I miss him.. Hmm...

100110 (845pm)

2010-01-10T20:33:00.003+08:00

Wad is love? Unconditioned love.. Onli Daddy God will love me unconditionally. Others? Am there for them taken for granted?

Life is full of unforeseen circumstances.. Ppl falling in love unexpectedly.. Ppl falling outta love unexpectedly.. Ppl holding on to love ''unexpectedly''..

爱可以让人变的很勇敢。。也可以让人变的好脆弱。。人为何得爱？？

A Sat morn @ a polyclinic (090110, 0945hrs)

2010-01-09T09:25:00.005+08:00

Its such a long wait @ d polyclinic.. I've been here for more than an hour & I'm still waiting..??!! What is this man??!! Wad m I doin here on a Sat morn all by myself??!! Tis is madness.. *yawn*

I dun u'stan y polyclinics always so high traffic de lor.. Gimme a break man.. If nt for tt referral letter I wont come here lor.. Its crazy waiting here.. Zzzz

Hw I wish someone is here wif me.. Ahh... My head hurts.. I'm feelin so uncomfortable & so lonely.. Feelin so hungry too.. Ahhh...... Gd thing I've my iphone wif me.. Hope the battery can last me thru the whole waiting game here.. Zzzz

So sianz lor... I've a rich man's illness.. Migraine.. Long term medication.. Yucks!!

I miss my bf.. 你在哪里？ =(

Daily Thots (7 Jan 10, 8.25am)

2010-01-07T08:06:00.003+08:00

Ytd went Bishan for dinner with my Dar.. We ate alot @ Sake Sushi.. Yummy.. Then we headed to AMK Hub for our movies 'Sherlock Holmes'.. V nice show but a few scenes gave me d goosebumps.. Eeks.. Finished d movies @ abt 12am.. Then we took a bus bck to Dar's plc to take d car to send me hme.. As usual.. We chatted awhile b4 i went upstairs.. Aiyah.. As usual cant bear to go hme lor.. aiyoo.. Y m i so sticky to him?? Cos I only see him on wkdays & its only for few hrs lor.. Wkends he's always occupied wif his programs & so am I.. Hmm..

I always missed having him ard me.. He makes me luff.. Makes me feel at ease & secured being ard him.. Being with him.. Hw much I wished time would just stop for the moment.. It doesn't matter where we go or hw tired I am.. I just wana be with him..

如果这就是爱。。
我好想他。。

Daily Thots (6 Jan 10, 10am)

2010-01-06T09:58:00.002+08:00

I cannot believe this! I've been sending reminders on meeting invites via email since late Dec 09 & I've nvr received ur reply until tdy I decide to use d 'read receipt' function & u replied saying u're nt available & ask me check ur calendar on current. Pls.. Hw can I assume tt time slot u put in ur calendar is updated or nt & worst scenerio is u're seated juz a stone's throw distance away fm me.. Wtf man??...

Ok.. Diverts my anger away.. Called Jie to apologize & telling her I Love her.. Felt so much beta aft tokin to her.. I love my sister.. I really do..

Ahh.. So much for updatin my status on FB & gettin msn/sms fm family & frenz askin wads wrong.. Haizz.. I alrdy said complicated lor.. So complicated I wont explain much de laa.. V stressed laa.. Ahhh...

I miss him lots.. But wad more can I do?? Will I see sunshine always or gloomy clouds will folo me?? I wana remain as Ms Sunshine also.. But tough ah?..

Ok... Bck to reality... Wrk..

sadness (6 Jan 10, 1am)

2010-01-06T00:09:00.003+08:00

why do you wana say such things to me at such time?? why wana tick me off at this time?? i've no intentions of takin u for granted nor will i ever wana take u for granted.. i wanted to ride d scooter out but tinkin mebbe u'll wana ride it cos u missed riding, so i took d scrambler out.. in d end?? i was blamed as takin u for granted & u're so pissed off wif me.. wad??!!

u shld noe me beta than others.. but i m wrong.. u do nt noe me as well.. u hurt me wif ur words.. i may hab hurt u & made u angry wif my actions but tt doesn't give u a reason to tick me off lidat..

i thot thr's at least 1 person in tis world who'll luv me unconditionally no matter wad happens.. but at tis pt of time in my life.. u too disappointed me.. ya.. onli God will luv me unconditionally no matter wad happens.. everyone tinks otherwise of me.. i dun like it & i really hate myself for everything.. so bloody useless of me to be unable to put across my thots to others.. always being blamed for things tt i nvr wan them to be..

life is a bitch.. yucks!!

Anyway.. I'm really sori for everything.. & Blogging here is onli my form of releasin my inner negativity.. Beta than i go drink myself dead.. I still luv u as much as i always do..

Daily Thots (5 Jan 10, 1052am)

2010-01-05T10:47:00.002+08:00

Y cant I hab a simple life? Y muz I b a divorcee wif 2 kids? Y issit so tough for me to start all over again? Y r thr judgement everywhere? I hate it lor! I juz wana start a new chapter in my life? Y cant I hab it?

Father, I'm tired. Really tired. V tired.

Daily Thots (4 Jan 10, 1148pm)

2010-01-04T23:40:00.003+08:00

wad more can u expect when happiness is always short-lived?? or i shld say.. i nvr had d last luff outta it.. trials & tests.. always have my share.. d more i feel life's beginning to chng for d beta for me.. d more i'll fall hard on my knees.. but.. do u noe wad issit tt's crushin me?? u'll nvr noe d real reason cos i'll nvr share.. it takes 2 hands to clap.. everything happens for a reason & at the rite season.. u reap wad u sow.. wad hab i sowed? nuttin.. so i get nuttin.. life's a bitch.. smtin nt worth tokin abt & smtin nt worth botherin abt.. simplify it?? it sucks..

i thot nw finally i'm d rider.. but in d end.. i'm still d pillion.. always taken for a ride.. everyone takes me for a ride.. y?? cos i'm stupid?? ya.. i m stupid.. confirmed!!

Daily Thots (4 Jan 10, 415pm)

2010-01-04T15:57:00.003+08:00

Flashbacks of 2009 occupying my mind.. Gf gets ditched.. Gf gets hitched.. Gf gets stitched.. Oh my.. What an eventful year..

Hw abt me? I got ditched & hitched till I'm unsure wads real & wads unreal.. So crazy so zombie.. Lucky nvr gt stiched.. Praise the Lord!

Happiness issit so hard to get & so difficult to kip for long? Isn't it supposed to be easy & simple when u used ur heart truely to do things? Trials & tests just nvr fails to accompany our paths ah? Hw to take it like a pinch of salt when its always thr? Hw to take everything positively? Oh, I really dunno..

Oh God.. I pray for favour upon my loved ones & frenz.. That Father u can kip them safe & happy.. Let no trials & tests be too tough for them to handle.. Amen!

Daily Thots (3 Jan 10, 9.41pm)

2010-01-03T20:34:00.002+08:00

Went to Kyan's 3rd bday @ Kallang Mac. The kids had a great time, so do the adults I supposed.

Next off to Jurong Pt to buy Andrea's sch bag & water btl. Then we took the train hme. Bought McFlurry @ CWP to eat while walking hme. Then gt stuck @ their hse cos of the sudden downpour. Yucks! Had to endure the fact that my ex is in the room with his gf. Wake up Gracey!! Its nt ur biz anymore!!

Came hme uploaded a few pics & had dinner with Jie & Jie Fu. Jie cooked dinner & it was delicious. Hme cooked food, always so delicious. Nw watchin DVD 'Up' wif them. Its such a hilarious show. Hahaha..

Kinda miss him. Wonder what he's doing nw?..

Daily Thots (3 Jan 10, 1am)

2010-01-03T00:51:00.003+08:00

Went for nite riding wif Jie & Jie Fu. I'm really sucha dumb ass lor. Dunno hw to handle d scrambler & made bth Jie & Jie Fu so worried cos I nearly met wif an accident. tsk tsk.. Wad can I say? I'm too nervous or too over-confident that I thot I can do d U-turn smoothly? haizz..

When was d last time i saw him (30 Dec 09) & when will be the next time I'll see him (mebbe 4 Jan 10)? I miss him.. =(

Pray that my future riding trips will be a safe one. Amen!

Daily Thots (2 Jan 10, 555pm)

2010-01-02T17:50:00.005+08:00

Its another headache, vomiting day. Gotta make a point to go polyclinic next Sat & get my referral letter to a neurologist. This stupid headache is getting on my nerves man. All the pain & vomiting is irritating me.

Called baby earlier on & realised her dad didn't bring her out. See la! Haiz.. Dunno what to say abt her dad.

Wonder what he's doing now? Miss him.. Just have to wait for him to call me. Its another waiting day..

Daily Thots (2 Jan 10, 350am)

2010-01-02T03:09:00.003+08:00

What am I thinking of? I'm so confused.. Life has been like a roller-coaster ride for me. The ups & downs gives me the thrills yet at times make me feel nausea & sick.

God has been kind to me in 2009. The things I went thru, some were so harsh that I really fell hard & bled. But thank God I managed to survive all the trials & move on to where I am now. Praise the Lord! But each time I stand up, I enjoyed peace for a moment & the next test sets in. Oh God.. I'll ask. How many more tests must I go thru in order to live that simple life that I yearn for? There may be some who thinks what I'm going thru is so minor & It's all my fault that I should live such a life now. I can only repeat again, it takes 2 hands to clap. Thou I always admit fault, but do remember that I'm not solely responsible for such A outcome today.

Today is baby's bday. She's 5 years old this year. What have I given her all these years?Nothing. I'm a bad mother. She spent her childhood away from me. At times I'll think back. Perhaps I should have stayed on for the children's sake, but I didn't cos I really can't stay with that man anymore. A man whom I used to love so deeply with all my heart & my breathe. Everything said now is useless. No point arguing who's right & who's wrong. Everything is over. Love is over. All that is left are memories, sweet ones?..

Relationships after the broken marriage didn't bring much joy either cos I always ended up getting hurt. Men.. What do they treat me as? Someone on standby for them cos of my kindness towards them? But I don't blame them either cos I'm also not a good woman & I wasn't a good gf too. Happiness for me is always short-lived & I'm like not surprised I can't have it for long.

Feeling so mentally/physically drained out. Feel so sour inside.

Now I've found someone who loves me alot & I love him too. Will I have a happy ending or it'll be another short-lived happiness for me again? I don't dare to think of it cos I'm so scared of losing this time. I haven't seen him for awhile & I miss him alot. Oh God.. Give me the strength to tide thru all these positively & do pray that this relationship will work out right this time. Amen!

18 June 09

2009-06-18T14:21:00.000+08:00

soooooo sleepy... wana doze off liao...
soooooo tired... wana die off liao...
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

countdown continues... 3 more days to go...
time passes soooooo slowly...

Daily Thots

2009-06-17T15:02:00.008+08:00

can someone juz do sm charity work here??
pls take tt person away & kip him far far away can??
i'm so irritated wif him!!
y can't he juz kip his mouth shut if he dunno wad he's talkin abt??!!
feel lik kickin his in his arse..
*dammit*

but then again.. i've gotta forgive him.. forgive his stupidity..
oppss.. i meant.. forgive him as he's still a kid..
*yucks*

Oh God.. forgive me.. take away my anger..
may the Prince of Peace be wif me always..
Amen!

countdown to my SH trip.. 4 more days to go..
Yipee!!
Shalom~

IT savvy

2009-06-16T16:12:00.001+08:00

OMG!!!
i need a IT savvy person to help me!!!
somebody save me!!!

Daily Thots

2009-06-16T15:02:00.003+08:00

life's a game.. either you win or you lose..
but i gotta take life easy & take each step at a time..

anyway.. God has really blessed me..
i'm going for my well-deserved holiday trip in another 5days time..
countdown party begins now..

Daily Thots

2009-06-16T11:30:00.001+08:00

have been really busy with work recently.. doing projects.. back to projects.. enjoyed projects.. thou really fustrated with projects.. hahaha.. life revolves around projects at the moment..

All glory to God..

Sad & Disappointed

2009-04-22T22:36:00.003+08:00

Why did such things happened tonight? All the unexpected. This is what I want to say to the few:

Mummy

You were the nicest "Mummy" I've been calling for almost 32 years. Tonight you raised your voice and shouted at me for the 1st time, all because of a man who's been living with you for years. I'm so hurt by your words and actions. The moment you shouted at me, my heart ached so much. All the respect I have for you is lost after tonight. You didn't stand up for me it's ok. But you didn't even stand up for your own daughter when that asshole shouted at her. For this reason, you really don't deserve my respect.

R**ger Y*p

You are someone who don't deserve any respect from anyone at all because you never respect others as well! Tonight you shouted at all of us and keep pointing your fingers at us. You are so damn bloody rude! Did your parents teach you that? I feel so sad for your parents. They'll be so damn disappointed and shameful if they see you behaving like that. You only have the guts to shout at us but not Ah Gu. Why? You scared he slap your f**king face?! Dammit! And you even shouted at me asking to to shut up! You said tonight is a family event and I am not part of the family. If I am not, then who do you think you are?! Who the f**k you think you are?! I used to respect you always greeting you when I see you. But after tonight, you're just a piece of shit! Oh no. I meant, you're nothing in my eyes. You don't even deserved to be in my sight! And you don't even deserved to be named in my blog cause you suck! Yucks! I really hope you'll read my blog and see how lousy you are. Pui!!!

Bobby & Stephanie

What happened to the little kids I once knew? Why have you changed so much? Whatever you've done and said, you really hurt your mum's heart. Each time I hear her talk about you kids, she cried so hard and my heart ached so much. How could the both of you bear to hurt her? You think having you in the stomach and giving birth to you is easy? You've never gone thru labour pain you won't know. The hardship she went thru to raised you kids, aren't you supposed to be grateful and just be sensible? She didn't expect you to be an intelligent kid but she also don't expect you to be rebellious. Can you just wake up from your dreamland and play your rightful role in the family? Is it so difficult to ask from you? You caused kinship to sour, is that what you want? You'll be parents in future. How would you feel if your kids treat you this manner? Don't tell me that you won't teach your kids this way like how your mum teach you because, you can't even teach yourself well now. But a word of truth, your current dad really loves both of you. His manner may not be accepted by you now but when you grow up, you'll know what he has done for you is for the good of you.

I'm so utterly disappointed. But who am I to judge? I hope the kids will realised their mistakes and return back to their mum.

Pray that Abba will watch over this family. Give them the peace and show them the way to stay united as a family. May the Prince of Peace be with all of us. Amen.

Daily Thots

2009-02-04T17:07:00.002+08:00

I'm confused.. So confused with myself.. What are my wants?? What are my needs??

Life is really full of choices/decisions/consequences..

I'm sinking.. Standing on quick sand.. Dying soon..
Let's not hope for the worst.. Hope that everything will turn out fine..

Continue to pray.. Seek comfort in His arms.. Seek for the peace I needed most..
Leave it all to God as He has it all planned for me..

Can I do what I just said?? Wait and see..

Irritated!!

2008-11-28T12:53:00.001+08:00

why the fart smell cannot go away??!! yucks!! i tink d designer behind me farted.. nw the air is filled wif tt smell & i cant get outta ofc!! shitz!! dammit!!

IRRITATED!!

Declare Fresh Air!!

Wrongs

2008-11-20T18:40:00.002+08:00

i noe i've done wrong.. wadever i've chosen.. is a wrong.. but i cant turn bck nw.. i really cant.. i dun hab a choice.. dun force me..

Life

2008-11-20T17:58:00.002+08:00

ppl always tell me.. God is fair.. how fair?? hw do we gauge??

my life?? i cant be bothered abt it @ d moment.. since iz alrdy so messy..

frenz who take ppl lik me for granted.. many in tis world.. countless.. but y does it hab to happen so many times a yr?? a test to my endurance level?? a test against my patience??

a gf of mine.. had an unhappy incident.. dun wana share here thou.. but i dun tink iz fair for her lor.. i wonder wad greater plans Daddy has for her?? thou she's nt Daddy's child.. yet..

some other ppl.. embraced wif Daddy's luv.. misuses it.. misinterprets it.. spoils it..

Get A Life

2008-11-19T16:18:00.008+08:00

dammit!! dun u f**kin hell irritate me!! i'm alrdy v tolerant towards u!! dun u push ur f**kin luck!! aHHHHHhhhhhHHHhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

y do i hab to tolerate all ur nonsense?? f**k off man.. u always made my blood boil when i tok to u!! thou i dun tell it in ur face.. get tis f**kin rite.. u f**k off my life beta!!

aaahhhhhhHHHHhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bcos of u.. i had to re-edit my blog & chng d contents.. i'm so f**kin pissed off wif u nw.. ahhhhHHHHHhhhh!!!!!

*names hab been left out for protection purpose*

extracted fm www.rbc.org:
He who has knowledge spares his words. Someone who displays wisdom will think before speaking, and then will share only insights likely to be helpful. A man of understanding is of a calm spirit. A mature person exhibits understanding by keeping cool in conflict. The next time you become angry, stop and prayerfully reflect for a moment. Ask God for a calm spirit and the right words to say. Remember, cooler heads prevail.

Dear Daddy.. pls take away d anger in me.. take away all d bad thots runnin in my mind.. pls cast d devil outta me nw.. pls gimme a calm spirit.. pls forgive me Daddy.. in Jesus' name.. Amen~

Happy??

2008-11-18T11:53:00.001+08:00

i'm really unhappy..
unhappy wif my life..
unhappy wif my work..
unhappy wif almost everything now..

i wana be happy..
declare happiness!!
declare favour!!
declare abundance joy!!

reGreTs

2008-11-18T10:56:00.002+08:00

i always tell myself.. never live my life wif regrets..
nw i'm startin to regret in almost everything i do..

am i happy?? at times..
am i sad?? quite frequently..

someone once told me.. i used to smile fm my heart..
nw my smile is only on d surface..
quite true.. i totally agree on tis comment..

i dun u'stan where has all d happiness gone to??
m i nt supposed to hab it??
m i nt worth of havin it??

i'm tired once again..
mentally.. physically.. spiritually..

Someday.. Sometime..

2008-11-18T10:29:00.004+08:00

what hab i done??
what needs to be done??

emotions overrule my mind & heart..
i cant do wad needs to be done..

its a ripple effect..
decisions i make nw causes other effects on others..
all d consequences i've to face nw..

its ok..
someday.. sometime..
all will be done..

forgive me..

Misinterpreted / Misunderstood/ Taken For Granted

2008-11-17T15:46:00.002+08:00

issit beta to b misinterpreted/misunderstood by others by wad you've just said?? or issit beta to b taken for granted for the things that you've done??

it seems lik i'm always at d wrong place.. at d wrong time.. is tis a joke??

its nvr a coincidence why we're at sm places.. its always for a purpose.. like why sm of us are here & why sm had to go elsewhere..

tryin to multi-task here.. but in d end.. kena multiplied (burden)..

am tryin to keep d faith strong.. keep it thr.. its hard thou.. but i must learn to believe..

Daily Thots

2008-11-17T14:24:00.003+08:00

smtin's just nt rite wif tis r/s.. i just cant make out wads wrong..

assumptions:

- he's nt so much of a "I Love Daddy" person??

- we dun share a common interest/topic??

- he really loves me a lot.. but for d rite reasons??

but we do nt judge others by:

- their academic qualifications..

- their income status..

- their daily habits in life..

- their characters..

bcos our Daddy do not judge us too.. no matter wad.. eventually when we all become COG.. we're all blessed & connected in Jesus' name..

wad can i say?? wad can i do??

Dear Daddy.. pls lead d way.. pls hold my hand tightly.. pls guide me thru tis difficult period.. let me make no more mistakes.. no more.. & pray that Daddy you'll rmber my sins no more.. in Jesus' name.. Amen~

Daily Thots

2008-11-16T18:40:00.002+08:00

suddenly felt like bloggin aft being away for such a long time..

shifted to a new place in JW abt 3wks ago.. rented a rm which costs me $480/mth (c/w mattress/aircon/cupboard).. stayin wif a young couple (wife same age as me, hubby older than me 2-3yrs) & they hab 2 kids.. Donovan is 6yrs old & Krystel is 3yrs old.. d kids are cute & r quite well-mannered.. they'll greet me "JieJie" when they see me.. esp Krystel.. nice havin them ard.. heex..

at times they're quite noisy in d living rm & their parents always worry tt i might b disturbed by their noises.. in fact.. i enjoyed their noises.. feels hme.. i simply missed my gals.. at times i hear them play outside wif their parents.. i'll start to tink.. y cant i hab such a life?? i used to hab it.. where has it gone to?? tinkin & tinkin makes me cry.. haiz.. crybaby attack..

anyway.. still nt v used to stayin outside on my own.. at times i wake up in d middle of d nite (nitemares again) & when i realised there isn't a close kin wif me in d hse.. i start cryin again.. i felt so lonely.. so alone in tis world..

d trip hme fm wrk is nt as bad as my 1st nite bck.. suddenly in d train all unfamilar faces.. none i've seen b4.. i sms-ed Jie.. & i cried in d train.. stupid ppl keep starin at me machiam i'm some alien.. hahaha..

haiz.. here i am.. eating cup noodles & studyin for my exams.. kinda missed some gd old oiliness in my life.. hahaha..

thou i'm nt v happy at times.. still pondering if i've made a wrong move in life.. but.. life still goes on..

Dear Daddy.. pray that You'll continue to watch over me.. Bless me in every areas of my life & take care of ALL things in my life.. Gimme d strength to be able to work & study at the same time.. Bless all my love ones.. All these I pray in Jesus' name.. Amen~

Daily Thots

2008-09-15T17:37:00.002+08:00

why are there some people who can try 1 time and die so easily, while some people can try all means but still never succeed and die??

life is so tough.. so many decisions to make.. so many consequences to face.. so many unhappiness.. so many sorrows.. so many past to remember..

are you happy with your life?? am i happy with my life?? beats me too.. who can answer my question??

so tired.. very tired.. damn tired.. emotionally tired.. physically tired..

Daily Thots

2008-09-12T14:22:00.002+08:00

sometimes i just wonder what did i do wrong?? must i do everything you like or felt is correct?? or am i supposed to live a life that is considered my own or yours??

i appreciate all your kind thoughts.. all your concern.. but.. don't do that to me when i do something that is against how you felt it should be..

a penny for my thoughts??

God bless~

Daily Thots

2008-09-09T12:12:00.002+08:00

life is getting tough.. alot of changes here and there.. alot of new happenings in my life.. alot of decisions i've to make.. alot of consequences i've to face.. alot of burdens on my shoulder..

whatever it may be.. i'll never want to be a burden to anybody nor be an obstacle in anybody's life or relationship..

God bless all around me..

Movie Nite - Death Race

2008-09-03T14:31:00.003+08:00

Rating: NC16
Consumer Advice: Some violence and coarse language
Genre: Action-Thriller
Language: English
Director: Paul W.S. Anderson
Cast: Jason Statham, Joan Allen, Tyrese Gibson, Ian McShane

Jason Statham leads the cast of an action-thriller set in the post-industrial wasteland of tomorrow, with the world’s most brutal sporting event as its backdrop. A penitentiary full of felons has inspired the jailers to create a grisly pastime ripe for lucrative kickbacks. Now, adrenalized inmates, a global audience hungry for televised violence and a spectacular arena come together to form the Death Race.

Three-time speedway champion Jensen Ames (Statham) is an expert at survival in the harsh landscape that has become our country. Just as he thinks he has turned his life around, the ex-con is framed for a gruesome murder he didn’t commit. Forced to don the mask of the mythical driver Frankenstein—a crowd favorite who seems impossible to kill—Ames is given an easy choice by Terminal Island’s warden (Joan Allen): suit up or rot away in a cell.

His face hidden by a metallic mask, one convict will be put through an insane three-day challenge. Ames must survive a gauntlet of the most vicious criminals in the country’s toughest prison to claim the prize of freedom. Driving a monster car outfitted with machine guns, flamethrowers and grenade launchers, one desperate man will destroy anything in his path to win the most twisted spectator sport on Earth.

This action-thrill movie is insane man.. but i simply loved the speed.. too fast too violent.. see the way they drive thru all the traps and gunshots fired by the opponents.. dammit.. when can i drive at such a speed man??!!

overall.. thumbs up man!!

愛

2008-09-02T15:00:00.003+08:00

人生就是為了找尋愛的過程，
每個人的人生都要找到四個人
第一個是自己,
第二個是你最愛的人，
第三個是最愛你的人，
第四個是共度一生的人.

首先會遇到你最愛的人，然後體會到愛的感覺；
因為了解被愛的感覺，所以才能發現最愛你的人；
當你經歷過愛人與被愛，學會了愛，才會知道什麼是你需要的，
也才會找到最適合你，能夠相處一輩子的人。
但很悲哀的，在現實生活中，這三個人通常不是同一個人；
你最愛的，往往沒有選擇你；
最愛你的，往往不是你最愛的；
而最長久的，偏偏不是你最愛也不是最愛你的，
只是在最適合的時間出現的那個人。

你，會是別人生命中的第幾個人呢？

沒有人是故意要變心的，他愛你的時候是真的愛你，
可是他不愛你的時候也是真的不愛你了，
他愛你的時候沒有辦法假裝不愛你；
同樣的，他不愛你的時候也沒有辦法假裝愛你。

當一個人不愛你要離開你，
你要問自己還愛不愛他，
如果你也不愛他了，千萬別為了可憐的自尊而不肯離開；
如果你還愛他，你應該會希望他過得幸福快樂，
希望他跟真正愛的人在一起，絕不會阻止，
你要是阻止他得到真正的幸福，就表示你已經不愛他了，
而如果你不愛他，你又有什麼資格指責他變心呢？

愛不是佔有，
你喜歡月亮，不可能把月亮拿下來放在臉盆裡，
但月亮的光芒仍可照進你的房間。
換句話說，你愛一個人，也可以用另一種方式擁有，
讓愛人成為生命裡的永恆回憶，

如果你真愛一個人，就要愛他原來的樣子─愛他的好，也愛他的壞：
愛他的優點，也愛他的缺點，
絕不能因為愛他，就希望他變成自己所希望的樣子，
萬一變不成就不愛他了。

真正愛一個人是無法說出原因的，
你只知道無論何時何地、心情好壞，你都希望這個人陪著你；
真正的感情是兩人能在最艱苦中相守，也就是沒有絲毫要求。

畢竟，感情必須付出，而不是只想獲得；
分開是一種必然的考驗，
如果你們感情不夠穩固，只好認輸，
真愛是不會變成怨恨的。

兩人在談情說愛的時候，
最喜歡叫對方發誓，許下承諾我們為什麼要對方發誓，
就是因為我們不相信對方，我們根本不相信情人，
而這些山盟海誓又很不切實際：
海枯石爛、地老天荒，都不能改變我對你的愛!

明知道海不會枯、石不會爛、地不會老、天不會荒；
就算會，也活不到那時候。
許下諾言的時候千萬注意，不要許下可以實現的諾言，
最好是承諾做不到的事，
反正做不到的，隨便說說也不要緊，

請記住：”不可能實現的諾言最動人”
在愛情裡，說的是一套，做的是另一套；
講的人不相信，聽的人也不相信。

你呢？找到了第幾個？
茫茫人海中，你遇見了誰？誰又遇見了你？

Daily Thots

2008-08-12T12:52:00.002+08:00

wad am i doin wif my life? is it d way i wan things to be?
i'm tired. v tired. super tired. extremely tired.
dun pity me. dun look at me differently. i'm just an ordinary person.

but i'm also special in a way. i'm a Child Of God.
i'm clinging to the cross. Daddy will take care of ALL things.
Amen~

Daily Thots

2008-07-26T10:05:00.002+08:00

here i am.. sitting in the office.. waiting for the internal meeting to start.. its a Saturday leh.. why ask us to come back at 930am?? i didn't sleep enough you know?? these few days work is already so much yet Saturday also don't let me sleep longer??!!

haiz.. what can i say?? all i can do is sit infront of the computer and browse thru the internet.. click on facebook.. blog abit here and there.. check email (personal only)..

so tired.. so sleepy.. so hungry..

later going Excelsior Hotel.. Allan & Clara's baby daughter, Chloe's baby shower.. buy what for her leh?? don't know wor.. later fetch the kids go shop awhile.. if can't find anything.. then will give them red packet le..

anyway.. hope my GPS works.. if not.. think i'll be doing my rounds in town again.. petrol rounds.. hahaha..

ahhh!! can the meeting quickly start?? OMG!!

Movies with Colleagues "The Dark Knight "

2008-07-25T13:08:00.002+08:00

Rating: PG
Language: English
Director: Christopher Nolan
Cast: Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Gary Oldman, Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman
Runtime: 153 mins

The follow-up to the action hit “Batman Begins," "The Dark Knight”reunites director Christopher Nolan and star Christian Bale, who reprises the role of Batman/Bruce Wayne in his continuing war on crime.

With the help of Lieutenant Jim Gordon and District Attorney Harvey Dent, Batman sets out to destroy organized crime in Gotham for good. The triumvirate proves to be effective, but they soon find themselves prey to a rising criminal mastermind known as the Joker, who thrusts Gotham into anarchy and forces the Dark Knight ever closer to crossing the fine line between hero and vigilante.

Academy Award nominee Heath Ledger (“Brokeback Mountain”) stars as arch-villain The Joker, and Aaron Eckhart plays District Attorney Harvey Dent. Maggie Gyllenhaal joins the cast in the role of Rachel Dawes. Returning from “Batman Begins” are Gary Oldman as Lieutenant Jim Gordon; Oscar winner Michael Caine (“The Cider House Rules”) as Alfred; and Oscar winner Morgan Freeman (“Million Dollar Baby”) as Lucius Fox.

Watched this movie with Joanna, May, Nicholas & his wife, Jintao & his wife, Kaili & Junhui. Worth the money and time to watch but the cinema we went to was the one at Marina Square. The few of us, those with longer legs, ended up having slight cramps to kneecaps and backache. Hmmm.. Next time want to watch such a movie with a long runtime, must make sure we choose a cinema with good seating.

Overall rating : Great!!

Daily Thots

2008-07-23T14:22:00.002+08:00

What is wrong with me? Why can't I control my emotions well? How irresponsible can I be? How can I put other people's life at stake?

Dammit!! I'm so utterly disappointed with myself!! So damn angry with myself!!

But then again, I really thank God for taking care of everything. Really thank Him for not letting anything major happened nor let anyone get injured due to my carelessness. Praise the Lord!

tired

2008-07-10T09:50:00.001+08:00

i'm tired.. so tired.. very tired.. extremely tired.. unexplainable tiredness..

Why?

2008-07-09T22:55:00.004+08:00

why are you so curious so concerned to find out where i went and whom i work for?! why do you need to ask others why they employ me?! you really have a problem wif me?! i treated you so kind yet you treated me that way and i already decided to let it go.. but why is it that i'm already out of that place for such a long time and yet you still want to check on me?! can you just wake up your fxxking mind?! go get something better to do!! be more professional and more matured will you?!

i just don't understand why some people can behave this way?? they have nothing better to do or they are just so damn kaypoh?!

i'm so irritated with you!! kindly just go get a life!! go live a normal life!! you really pissed me off!!!

^$$%£"%)(*&^^£"&*()_$%!"*

what happened??

2008-06-30T10:09:00.002+08:00

ytd wasn't such a pleasant nite but all thanks to Daddy that i survived..

supposingly aft church svc i had to rush to NLB to meet my sch mates to discuss on our project.. time arranged was 4.30pm.. aft svc ended at abt 4.30pm.. instead of rushin to NLB i went dinner wif my church mates as it had been awhile since i last chatted wif them.. they're always so kind to me so i really missed hanging out wif them.. they even purposely drove fm Suntec to Bugis so that we can hab dinner together and i could go off to NLB fm there.. how nice of them rite?? halfway thru d trip thr my HP kept ringin.. msgs keep comin in.. all fm my sch mates askin my whereabouts.. cut d story short.. i reached NLB at abt 6.30pm.. 1 of d gals keep "attackin" me and gave me a super black face.. she said alot of unpleasant things but i chose to keep quiet instead of arguin back.. in d end at abt 7pm.. conculsion given by them was i am to finish typin d entire project and email to them by Tues for them to assess.. and presentation was to be done by me also.. dammit.. i argued abit but was useless.. so i agreed to do it.. sicko me..

in between.. due to d fact i need to get my prev study materials bck fm my ex's place.. ended up kena shouted by him on d phone thrice.. i dun u'stan y ppl hab to treat me lidat.. while i was drivin to Woodlands.. i was so angry so "lost" that i was driving pretty fast and even had d thots of just rammin my car towards d centre divider.. devil attack.. Daddy knew wad was happenin to me.. Daddy shut my thots out.. fm Mandai to Woodlands my mind was a blank.. no thots nuttin.. it was lik a split second i realised i was at Woodlands alrdy.. when i saw my kids.. peace came into my heart..

haiz.. worst still.. quarrelled wif ZQ twice as well.. sick leh.. y so many things ytd??

i'm carryin too many things on my shoulder.. its so heavy.. i feel so tired.. can i let go of everything?? can i??

i noe Daddy will never ever let go of me.. Daddy loves me.. i love Daddy too..

Daily Thots

2008-06-19T14:34:00.004+08:00

wad is happening to me?? why am i being so insensitive now?? why did i spent so much time on 1 person yet neglected another impt person in my life?? i dun mean that gal is not worth my time.. but this gal that i've neglected is so much more impt to me.. i felt so guilty and almost cried when i heard abt her feelin that we're not as close as b4.. i nvr wanted our friendship to turn out this way.. nvr will i wan to..

i dunno wad to say.. sayin sorry is not enuff.. pray that time will wash away all the unhappiness and misunderstandings and bring forth a beta and stronger friendship between us..

ytd English Skills results i got 28 upon 30.. i felt so sad and disappointed that i couldn't score full marks.. thkq to all those who said that i am good and that you're proud of me for scorin such marks.. i felt beta now.. ready to chiong for my test on Fri also..

haiz.. time is nvr enuff for me.. i've to juggle between work/sch/family/frenz.. time is not enuff lehz.. magic magic.. where are my magic powers??!! i wan more time more time..

juz reached hme aft wrk.. v tired.. v shagged out.. shaggy old doggie.. kekeke.. gotta spend time revision again.. tmr Quantitative Skills test.. pray for Favour!!

Daddy.. i leave it all in your good hands.. healing comes just being a child of God.. Amen~

tiredness falls in

2008-06-15T16:38:00.003+08:00

u nvr noticed d coldness in the tone when u called?? hw insensitive can u be?? u nvr realised u've done smtin wrong to make me treat u this way??

hw much more can i say?? i'm so tired of everything.. so tired.. so tired..

can u pls wake up and u'stan my feelings?? u need me to spell out your faults??

so very tired

2008-06-15T00:46:00.005+08:00

so wad if thr's Skype?? it doesn't make any difference at all if d other party is not concentrating on the chat wif u.. i rather stop d conversation and nt chat.. it doesn't cure d misses.. it increases d anger.. angry of being so far away.. long distance r/s is so difficult to handle.. i doubt i can handle it well..

nw i tink bck.. y do i wana stay hme and wait for a call when i could be out thr enjoyin myself?? and in d end.. get myself so angry over a small little thing.. i've doubts over my own decisions nw..

startin a new career and studies at d same time isn't easy at all.. i wana focus on my job but i've no time for my studies.. i wana focus on my studies yet i cant do much on my work.. doin both at d same time left me wif v little time readin God's words and also no time for my kids.. is these all wrong decisions made by me?? wad should i do?? its nt abt my time mgmt skills.. i alrdy cut away d gatherings and outings wif frenz yet i cant do much on anywhere else..

i'm tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. so damn tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. extremely tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. so so so so tired.. v tired.. super super tired.. v tired.. extremely extremely tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. so v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. v tired.. so tired..

aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.. i'm breakin dw again.. dammit..

Highly Favoured..Greatly Loved..Deeply Blessed..

2008-06-13T00:02:00.003+08:00

no matter how hard life is.. my Heavenly Father is still blessing me with abundance love.. i've a wonderful sister and brother-in-law.. they really loved me alot and really dote on me alot.. i wont take their love for granted..

Jie and Jie Fu.. sorry if i made both of you worried when i cried.. i'm just too overloaded.. too stressed out alrdy.. thkq for loving me so much.. i love the both of you alot too..

i wont fail Daddy, both of you, TB, people who love me, and myself.. i'll give it my best in my work and studies..

God bless all..

Daily Thots

2008-06-12T13:20:00.004+08:00

you're such a faker.. you pretend everything's ok.. but behind me.. you're a backstabber.. whatever u wana say or wana do.. it's your choice.. my passion towards my work will not be affected wif your actions.. you wana do it this way.. go ahead.. now i u'stan why you said that you dun hab much close frenz cos they all misinterpret your words.. i can tell you.. it's got nothing to do with them not understanding you.. it's you.. you alrdy offended me on too many occasions but i din wana tell u straight at your face.. last time i wont.. in future i also wont.. cos i tink your attitude sucks.. sucks badly.. and i'm gonna let you live it this way cos i dun care.. you dun deserved my respect for you cos aft treating you so nice.. you turned ard and bit me when things went wrong.. things that went wrong due to your carelessness and forgetfulness becomes my fault.. i seriously felt that i dun deserved to be treated like that by you.. all the best to you for whatever choice you had made today.. all i can do is pray that the company will not be affected by your carelessness and forgetfulness..

Dear Daddy.. pls take away my anger.. bless me with a positive attitude in my work.. do not let me be affected by such a backstabber.. let me continue to enjoy doing the job i've always loved and found fulfillment in.. pray that Daddy you'll bless me, the people ard me, and the place where i am in.. Amen!

Irritated

2008-06-09T12:07:00.002+08:00

can u stop chngin ur mind!!! set up starts tmr.. wad is wrong wif u??!! how r we supposed to work efficiently in this matter when the changes should hab been pointed out in the beginning.. its nt minor changes u know??

Oh Daddy.. pls gimme the strength to overcome this.. pls stop all these irritating issues..

.....

2008-06-09T11:07:00.003+08:00

feel so lost.. cant concentrate at work.. cant do anitink rite.. so many things on my mind nw.. very dis-orientated and dis-organised nw.. wad kinda english words m i using nw?? i dun even u'stan at all..

feel like giving up.. started new job and studies at the same time.. now i cant cope.. cant cope at all.. i m so tired.. so tired.. so tired..

i need time out.. need to run away.. need to stay away.. need to hide away.. need to go away..

God provides abundantly

2008-05-19T10:34:00.003+08:00

Woo Hoo~~

Went "prawning" with ZQ/Rina/Dean/Sean/Iris/Esther/Terence after church service. In fact, I didn't have much hopes of catching anything, or I should say catch much as the last time when I went "prawning" with them, I was the only person who had zero catch for the night. Sad right?

Anyway, I prayed with ZQ about it during our drive there. Prayed that Father will provide us with abundance harvest. Prayed that we'll have the most catch for that night. Amen!

We decided to compete as teams. The paired teams were me & ZQ, Iris & Esther, Dean & Terence, Sean & Rina. The loser teams were supposed to wash the prawns and bbq the prawns for the winning teams. Ready or not... Here it goes... 3 hours competition begins...

As usual, it started off very "bek chek" for us as everyone around us got their catch except for us. ZQ caught 2 prawns with his bare hands. (hahahaha) Didn't mean to do it like that but the prawns were resting on our net so why not just catch it and put in inside our net right? (hahahaha)

Slowly, time passes by. ZQ caught 1 prawn and I caught about 2 prawns. Whenever I felt the prawn nibble on my bait, I'll pull the bait too fast till the prawn will escape everytime it reaches the surface of the pond. Oh no... Sean & Rina's team had such a big catch. Made me felt even worst. I started singing and praying for Daddy to provide me with abundance harvest, plentiful prwans.

Coming to the last hour or less, I had continuous catch. Wooh!! The feel of getting a catch is so wonderful so fun. I was so excited whenever I caught a prawn.

Here comes the final count. After deducting away the 2 prawns ZQ caught with his bare hands, we won Sean & Rina's team by 1 prawn. 9 vs 8. Yeah!!!!!! Me & ZQ won by 1 prawn. Praise the Lord! I caught 8 prawns all by myself. Isn't Daddy so great so wonderful? But poor ZQ, because I had so much fun, I didn't share my rod with him. (hahahaha) Next time dude, I promised to share my rod with you. (hehehehe)

After returning our rods, we went to bbq the prawns. Oh wow!!!! The prawns were just so tasty so sweet. I enjoyed the entire fellowship for that night cos we were all having so much fun. Praise the Lord!

Went to have prata after that and at that place, we made plans for next Sat and Sun. It's gonna be a long nite out again. (*^_^*)

Manga Messiah

2008-05-18T00:03:00.002+08:00

Praise the Lord!!
Ask and it shall be given..

ZQ bought me the book "Manga Messiah".. *muacks* (^_^)
I'm gonna find time out soon to read it..

Manga Messiah

2008-05-13T23:15:00.005+08:00

Appealing to kids and adults, readers will find this edgy rendition of the Gospel accounts both compelling and highly engaging. This authentic, cutting-edge art style is combined with fast-paced storytelling to deliver biblical truths to an ever-changing culture that is often a challenge to penetrate. This is genuine Japanese manga style, unlike other Christian "manga" books in the marketplace.

Features:

• Gives a unique presentation of the Gospel accounts

• Includes a map of Galilee, Samaria, and Judea

• Includes illustrated character profiles of key Bible people

• Features an illustrated page on the twelve apostles

• A great way to introduce anyone to the Bible

I'm want this book and is currently searching for it. Wonder who can find it for me?

Movie Review

2008-04-08T14:03:00.003+08:00

"Step Up 2 the Streets" is the follow-up to the smash hit "Step Up," which ignited theaters in August 2006. When rebellious street dancer Andie (Briana Evigan) lands at the elite Maryland School of the Arts, she finds herself fighting to fit in while also trying to hold onto her old life. When she joins forces with the school's hottest dancer Chase (Robert Hoffman) to form a crew of classmate outcasts to compete in Baltimore's underground dance battle The Streets, she ultimately finds a way to live her dream while building a bridge between her two separate worlds.

Featuring the directorial debut of award-winning up-and-comer Jon M. Chu, "Step Up 2 the Streets" reunites much of the production team behind the original film including "Step Up's" cutting-edge hip-hop choreographer Jamal Sims, who is joined this time by choreographers Hi-Hat ("hip-hop's high diva of dance") and Dave Scott ("Stomp the Yard"). Patrick Wachsberger & Erik Feig of Summit Entertainment produce with Adam Shankman and Jennifer Gibgot of Offspring Entertainment.

This movie is too good to resist. The way they danced, the passion they bring out in their dance, its fabulous man... They are really very good dancers and they really have the groove man... How i wished I could dance like them too, which seems impossible. (hahahaha) The storyline is good too. It shows how united they are even when the odds are against them. Don't miss this show. Let's go dancing out in the streets baby~

Daily Thots

2008-03-31T23:43:00.003+08:00

spent the day at NLB with ZQ doing some research.. sounds kinda unlike me sial.. hahaha.. i still remembered d last time my ex-colleagues heard tt i'm gg to spent my time at d NLB.. they looked shocked.. ya.. shocked was d expression they gave me.. wa biangz eh.. i gt study one hor.. last time la.. kekeke..

dinner time came.. both ZQ and myself met up with Jie and Francis at Bugis.. we went to the restaurant called Ma Maison.. hmmm.. the food is delicious.. and the environment is quite cosy..

we had our 1st try on escargots.. it looks abit scary but in fact it tasted quite nice lor.. of cos you have to dip it in d sauce la.. if its without d sauce.. i tink i beta opt this dish outta my mouth.. err... cos the slimy feel of it sends d trembles down my nerves.. kekeke..

d sirloin steak i ordered was delicious man.. the beef was so tender and juicy.. fabulous.. fantastic.. yummy..

next stop.. Chinatown for our D24 durians.. yeah!! both me & ZQ won d D24 durians aft a snooker session at OCC last Sat.. so today we made our claim for the prize.. yummy yummy.. so long nvr eat durians le.. so delicious..

nw all d fart and d burps are filled with d D24 durians smell.. errr.. kinda yucky thou.. hahahahahahahahahahaha.. (^_^)

Diploma in Business Administration (DBA)

2008-03-19T23:33:00.003+08:00

I've enrolled with PSB Academy for the next intake in 7 May 08. Hope that the application for the subsidy with NTUC gets approved in time.

Classes: Weds and Fri, 7pm to 10pm
Venue: PSB Academy, next to Tiong Bahru Plaza
Duration : 300 hours (7 May 08 to 31 Dec 09)

Modules:
1) English Skills
2) Quantitative Skills
3) Principles of Economics
4) Financial Accounting 1
5) Principles of Marketing
6) Principles of Human Resource Management
7) Basic Business Statistics
8) Introduction to Organisational Behaviour
9) E-Commerce Management
10) Introduction to Business Policy and Strategy

Course fees :
Total => $3,959.00
After SDF-AIP => $1,859.00

Course fee excludes textbooks
- each module 1 textbook (est. $50 per textbook)

Pray that Father you'll watch over me. Bless me with the correct attitude to learn and the ability to understand all that will be taught. Amen!

Daily Thots

2008-03-17T12:26:00.002+08:00

i'm finally outta Watsons le!!! yipeee!!!

hmmm.. felt abit "lost" in the beginning but now starting to feel much beta le.. now i've abit more time for myself le.. have the time to chat wif frenz on msn.. catch up abit here and there.. heex (^_^)

oh.. i'm going to take my Dip in Biz Admin at PSB in May 08.. very excited abt it cos i've been wanting to do so for quite a long time le.. hope this time round i can really make it.. dun say say onli ah.. hahahaha..

hmmm.. tinking back.. life's been gd for me.. thou i cried so much abt work.. cried so much abt the hurt and injustice at work.. but it is also bcos of Watsons.. i got to know many nice ppl.. really very nice ppl.. thus i'll nvr regret joining Watsons..

Thank you Father for every single moment in my life. I know that Father you'll continue to watch over me and my loved ones and bless us in everything that we do. Pray that Father you'll continue to strengthen our faith and manifest your blessings on us. Amen!

Wads Wrong??!!

2008-03-12T19:44:00.004+08:00

wads wrong with her?? or perhaps, wads wrong wif me?? why does she need to treat me like that?? since she detest me so much.. why don't she just ask HR to give me 2mths pay and ask me to leave?? why wana make up this show and pretend to be Ms Nice when she's in fact Ms Evil?? i m no threat to her.. i'm still her subordinate ok??!!!

it hurts me alot whenever i tink abt her treatment towards me.. after so much so much i've done for her fought for her.. wad happened to it all?? she gets memory failure or wad??

so sad whenever i see whatever she's doing to hurt me and all the act she's putting infront of everybody.. does it matter so much to her for me to stay there and serve my 2mths?? wad issit she has against me that makes her wana let everyone buy her story and make me leave with immediate effect??

i nvr regret joinin that company cos of all the nice people i know thr.. in fact.. they're also a reason why i chose to continue staying thr..

but wads the use.. cant fight emotional wars with her.. she's just too much.. she goes around spreading rumors and putting poison in all the higher mgmt people's ears.. i really hope one fine day she gets played by her own game that she had set..

i really hope she'll wake up and open her eyes big enuff to see why 3 people under her has left.. i hope the higher mgmt people can really really open their eyes and ears to see wad is really happening rather than time to time always buy her story like she so pathetic always kena bullied by her subordinates..

oh Heavenly Father.. i pray that you will take away my anger, take away my pain, take away my sorrows, take away all my tears.. pray that Father you'll take away the ''stamps'' in other people's eyes and let them see the real truth behing it all.. pray that Father you'll takeover from here and restore me back physically and emotionally.. pray that Father you'll let no other person be unfairly treated like i was being treated here.. and in all these I pray in Jesus name.. Amen!!

The One Thing - Daily Devotional From New Creation Church

2008-03-06T12:25:00.002+08:00

Forgiveness Is For The Undeserving

Matthew 18:2121… “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?”

The Lord’s answer to Peter was simple: Up to seventy times seven. (Matthew 18:22) In other words, all the time!

“Well, Pastor Prince, he does not deserve my forgiveness.”

Neither did you deserve God’s. Listen, there is not a single person alive or dead who did not break all 10 of God’s commandments. There is no such thing as a “partial sinner” or “great sinner”. All of us were great sinners when Jesus saved us! And we need to have that revelation because if we know that we are forgiven much, we will love much. (Luke 7:47)

“Pastor Prince, how can you say that I have broken all 10 commandments? I have not committed adultery. I have been true to my wife since the day we were married.”

My friend, Jesus said, “If you lust after a woman in your heart, you have already committed adultery with her.” (Matthew 5:28) That is God’s standard. Man looks outward, but God looks inward. God sees the heart. So everyone has broken all 10 commandments. Everyone is a great sinner.

Now, you are no longer a sinner if you have received Christ as your Saviour — you are now a new creation. But you were a sinner and God forgave all your sins through the death of His Son. You owed God big time, but God forgave you of your huge debt through His Son’s death.

So if someone has wronged you, say this: “I did not deserve God’s forgiveness, but God forgave me through Christ. So I forgive this person also in Jesus’ name.” If you say something like, “He does not deserve it,” it makes no sense. Forgiveness is not for people who deserve it. If they deserve something, then it is punishment. No, forgiveness means that you extend grace. Grace means undeserved favour, like how God extends undeserved favour to you.

If you choose to hold on to bitterness, no one suffers but you. You lose your peace, health and sometimes even your life. It is not worth it! God says to you, “Let go. Forgive them their debts, just as I have forgiven you yours.” Don’t try to do it on your own. Bring the cross of Christ into the situation and you will find the grace to forgive!

Answers to Tough Qns [rbc ministries]

2008-03-06T11:46:00.003+08:00

Should I be concerned about this cloud of hopelessness that seems to hang over me?

Hopelessness is a dreadful feeling. The Bible says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick" (Proverbs 13:12). Many people go through times when they know something is terribly wrong, but they often can't put their finger on it. All they can explain is a strong sense that nothing is going to work out.

It's unwise to ignore chronic feelings of hopelessness. Our souls cannot live for long in a state of perceived hopelessness. Hope is the oxygen of the soul. Without a hopeful outlook, our souls will eventually suffocate.

Our dilemma is that a hopeful perspective is as fragile as it is indispensable. Situations beyond our control can delay the fulfillment of hope and leave us in a fog of uncertainty and despair. As hope seems to be collapsing all around us, the potential exists to lose heart and slip into a state of depression.

Depression is a troubled mood or state of the soul that has a dramatic effect on our bodies. We lose energy. Sleeping and eating patterns become abnormal. And we have difficulty concentrating.

Depression can be mild or major. The more depression interferes with a person's ability to sleep, to eat, to work, to focus, and to enjoy life, the greater the severity of depression, and the greater need there is to be concerned.

Sometimes a depressive mood lifts for no apparent reason. Usually, however, depression doesn't work itself out over time. Left to itself, it can linger on like an old injury that slowly wears a person down. Over time, it can grow into a severe debilitating problem. That's why it's important for those who are depressed to seek help.

An honest reflection of the following statements can alert a person to a potential problem with depression:
> I feel sad or shut down nearly every day.
> I have little or no interest in doing things I used to enjoy.
> I'm sleeping too little or too much.
> I'm eating too little or too much.
> I feel tired most of the time.
> I find it difficult to stay focused.
> I've lost interest in physical intimacy with my spouse.
> I feel overwhelmed by the burdens of life.
> I don't hold out much hope that my life will improve in the future.
> I shift between feeling helpless and unworthy to feeling angry and cheated.
> I think about death or killing myself.

Those who identify with two to four of the above statements should, at the very least, consider seeing a physician for a complete medical checkup. Sometimes these are symptoms of a pure medical condition. Those who identify with five or more of the above statements should consider seeking immediate professional help.

[I've identified at least 9 outta 11... how??]

Why?

2008-03-05T23:07:00.002+08:00

i just dun u'stan y they wana treat me lidat??
i dun deserve all these unfair treatment..
i've already given my best but they still think otherwise..
y r they so cruel to me??
y can't they be nice to me??

sometimes i just think wad issit that i did wrong to deserve all these??
issit my problem that i really cant perform??
they really break my confidence in my own work now..

i dread going to work..
i dread sitting beside them..
i dread seeing them..

wad have i done wrong??

brand new life as a christian

2008-02-24T23:23:00.004+08:00

i must learn and be able to:
- let go of the unhappy past
- accept all that has happened
- love my enemies
- stop all the curse and swears
- love and treasure my life
- live a godly life
- put all my cares and trust in God
- live each day to the fullest without regrets
- worship and praise God constantly
- set a good example as a christian
- let others feel the love God has given to me

[to be updated again]

Daily Thots

2008-02-22T23:30:00.002+08:00

suddenly had alot of emotions coming in..
sad.. hurt.. betrayed.. angry.. lost.. disappointed.. frustrated.. self-pity.. loneliness.. worthless.. relieved.. doubts.. liar..

oh wadever..
say too much also wrong.. becomes grumbling..
dun say anything also wrong.. becomes unfriendly and proud..

so hard to please everyone including myself..
so difficult to feel happy at times..

best method?? keep ur comments to yourself..
nt everyone has time or has mood for you..

Praise The Lord~

2007-12-08T10:37:00.000+08:00

The Day I Received Lord Jesus Christ

[[17th November 2007]]

Whatever....

2007-12-04T22:26:00.000+08:00

I know that since I've decided to let God handle my work issues, I shouldn't be thinking so much about it again. But I really wanted..... Aiyah.... Don't know what I want nor what I want to say.

Am I such a loser? I can't even decide what I want in life. Ask me what is it that I really want to do, what is that that I hope to achieve, or what is it that I wish to see myself in? I can't answer all these questions too.

Aiyah.... Just so tired of myself. So indecisive. So useless. So................

Whatever..................

Daily Thots

2007-12-02T22:06:00.000+08:00

Went to WMC wif Jie, Andrea & Adrienne for d 11.30am service. Adrienne was a bit "noisy" & Andrea was a bit restless today. Naughty gals. But everything was still under control & we still managed to finish d service without much hiccups.

Praise The Lord~

Today Pastor Wendy Watson said something abt "When there is love, there will not be filth & stench." "You Ai Jiu Mei You Chou". A very touching story behind this phrase.

Praise The Lord~

Oh, today's worship session I also sang together. I felt good. Don't really know how to explain d feelings but I sort of felt "connected". Connected to God perhaps? Hmmm...

Went Sembawang Park with Jie, Andrea & Adrienne. The gals had a great time thr. As usual at d initial part, Adrienne refused to walk on d sand on her own (scare dirty her feet) & wana to be carried around. But after a while, managed to convinced her to play on her own. The gals had so much fun that they requested me to bring them bck thr again.

We had fun today becos Jie made d effort to bring us ard. Thank you Jie for accompanyin & fetching us ard today. We sure do really love you a lot.

Thank you Father for blessing me with 2 beautiful gals, a very loving sister & a caring bro-in-law. I know whatever happens in the future, You made it happen bcos You want me to learn something out of it. Kindly bless me with the strength to overcome all obstacles. Amen~

Comments for the Day

2007-11-21T23:48:00.000+08:00

Dear Frenz

Kindly have the courtesy to leave down your names if you decide to leave your comments on my blog. I've no issue with anyone leaving their comments after reading my blogs but kindly have the guts to let me know who you are.

If you think that your comments are offensive, then DON'T even bother to leave your two cents worth of comments on my blog.

Everyone/Anyone who reads my blog should be mature enough to think before they pen down their comments. Since I don't criticise anyone's religion/beliefs, then DON'T criticise my religion/beliefs too.

Just to highlight, this is my blog and I'm free to write anything I like. If you don't like to read my blog, then DON'T read it. No one is forcing you to read it.

Take Care and God Bless!

Daily Thots

2007-11-19T23:31:00.000+08:00

I had a very tough day today. 1 of my working colleague gave me a very hard time today. I felt so fustrated until I went off to d Ladies to cry. I felt better after that. I was thinking, perhaps it's because i didn't seek God's blessings today thus my day was not a smooth one. I started to think of Pastor Prince's words. To acknowledge my own feelings but do not act on them. Thus, I chose to forgive d person who irritated me.

Crying is another way of releasing my stress. No worries. I always/usually feel better after crying it out.

Dear Lord Jesus,
Kindly bless the person with more kindness towards others. Let him realise that his attitude towards others is wrong.
Kindly take away my anger and forgive him.
Amen~

Thank You Lord Jesus

2007-11-17T21:21:00.000+08:00

Went to Jie’s house wif ZQ today to discuss abt job vacancies. Then we started to chat abt my prev blog. Then Jie suggested that we go to The Third Place today as it’ll be d last service alrdy. The Third Place is going to be relocated to another place. Wif no programs in mind today, we agreed (thou I used to find excuses to not attend services).

Before proceeding to The Third Place, we went to Leisure Park Kallang as I needed to take a look @ my job site. We passed by a store and somehow or rather, it attracted us in. We bought a “plain” jigsaw puzzle for Jean for her as a bday gift. We’re going to pen in our wishes for her on it & let her fix up d puzzle herself to see wad we had written for her. Next, we passed by a gift shop which the cross pendants attracted my interest. Jie asked me if I wanted one & I told her casually that I’ll liked to have one & also pointed out d design I wanted. Then I moved off to my store to check on my contractors leaving both of them there. When I came back to look for them, Jie had alrdy bought me d cross necklace that I wanted. I felt so happy & Jie helped me to put it on.

Guess what happened today? I received Christ Jesus together wif ZQ @ The Third Place. Pastor Alvin Chan prayed wif us, together wif Jie & Francis.

Oh, just to share. During d worshipping, there were a couple of times when I felt like my tears were filling my eyes. I had to shut my eyes tight & keep telling myself not to be a drama mama.

(^0^)

Anyway, I felt happy today. Can’t explain why also but I know God has something planned for me.

Thank you Lord Jesus for forgiving my sins & accepting me back in your arms again.
Praise the Lord! Amen~

Praise The Lord

2007-11-16T11:24:00.000+08:00

14 Nov 07
my boss called me @ 11pm & talked on d fone till 1150pm. purpose of call was to sort of hint me wads gg to happen to me d next day. she said alot alot of things which frightened me & in d end i slept @ 3am.

15 Nov 07
was listening to mp3 on d train ride to work. was jamming my ears wif d fast pace songs to try to calm myself dw due to ytd's conversation. when it came to d Gospel song "The One Thing" i felt so calm. in d end I kept repeating d song. when it came to Potong Pasir station. suddenly i had d urge to pray. i said a prayer & i finished d prayer @ Dohby Ghuat station. reached ofc & saw my boss's boss face super duper black in colour. shit! thunderstorm expected. in d end. d day ended w/o any thunderstorm. @ abt 7pm i played my Gospel cd in d ofc. my boss asked me to lower dw d music (thou it was alrdy v soft) cos she dun wan her boss to come out & scold me (which she felt will be d case). aft she left & her boss came out of her room asking "Who is d one playing Gospel songs?" my heart was tinkin "oh shit"!. i answered her softly saying its me. she turned to me & chatted wif me for awhile & also asked me to lend her d cd as well. & b4 she left d ofc she even thanked me for sharing such nice music in d ofc. all i could reply her was "ok".

hahahahahahaha. too frightened to answer her properly. =)

finished work @ abt 10pm. had an urge to look for Jie to pray for me. an urge to accept Lord Jesus into my life. but Jie did not ans my calls. it's ok. perhaps it wasn't d rite time yet.

reached hme said a short prayer. thanked Lord Jesus for making my day a smooth one as I've talked to him in d morn. thanked Lord Jesus for answering my prayer. Amen!

Dwarf or Dove

2007-10-04T23:21:00.000+08:00

Hey Hey Hey~

It's time to blog again. It's been quite sometime since I last blogged ah?

Today on leave as I have an appt with the skin doc (Dr. Jennifer Foo) @ Mount Elizabeth Medical Centre. Having a terrible breakout on my face, really terrible. When the doc saw me, she told me mine was severe & asked me how could i have waited so long then decided to consult a doc? Wanted to tell her why but I couldn't answer myself @ that time too. Was it because I don't have the time or I don't have the moni? Beats me too since I'm such a vain gal.

Doc's advice was to see her every week for the first month to monitor the progress of my treatment. Have t stop using my Clinique (anti-blemish) products with immediate effect. Oh gosh! I just bought the products about a month ago. To throw them away seems like a waste. Any takers out there?

Went to Alpha course @ WMC with Jie & ZQ. The dvd went retarded today. Made me lose my concentration leh. Then finished watchind the video clip at about 9pm before we were seperated into our groups again.

Jason mentioned about Jesus appearing as dove but pronounced it as dwarf. Made us laughed so loudly. Ice-breaker guy indeed.

Discussion today was about the Holy Spirit (which we missed the session last Saturday).

I asked a question but my question wasn't really being answered. What's the difference between the Holy Spirit and the Guardian Angel?

Haiz..... =(

Then the group mentioned something about being "slained". Sounds eerie to me. Don't think I want to be "slained".

Hmmm... Jason tried to get rid of a "myth" I had about the 7th month thingy.

Jason's "patent" Quote of the day:
If it's true, it's true for all.
If it's not true for all, it's not true at all.

Errr... Try harder next time.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Oh! I've something to say about tonight. The food ain't nice and there were 2 inconsiderate facilitators who were talking during the video clip. They only stopped until Jie turned over and signal them to keep quiet.

More to say about my thoughts, but I'm tired le. Will try to blog more tomorrow.

Too late to reply your sms le Jie. Good nite & sweet dreams to you. Love you always.

Sick & Tired of EVERYTHING

2007-09-11T23:20:00.000+08:00

I'm having a terrible headache. It's a piercing pain at the top right corner of my skull. I really hate this feeling. Take panadol already still doesn't work at all.

Shit!

Must be due to the stress at work. I really hate that back-stabber. I really hate that fella who pretended to be nice to me yet at my back, during his confrontation with my boss and the HR Director, dragged me into the picture. Instead of apologising over his poor performance at work, he puts all the blame on me. Say that I'm not being able to help him at all and thus cause him to be overloaded and stressed over work.

I hate this I hate this I hate this!!!

Then here I am guessing what did I do wrong to lose a best friend's concern over me. What did I do wrong? Why did she start to turn so cold towards me?

What's wrong with my life again? Everything seems to hit me so hard.

I've been a very hardworking staff at work. I really put in my best to do everything and to ease other's burden. Yet, I get it left and right on my back.

I know I've been neglecting my friends and family. But all I wanted was to concentrate on my career first. I want to be more stable first before I..............................

For all the favourite gym time I've given up and for all the fun time I have given up to be with my friends, all because I wanted to be better in my career, seems to be a wrong choice.

Nevermind la. I'm tired. I can't get the whole world to please me neither can I pleased the whole world.

Sometimes I just wished I had died the last time I tried to die.

Really damn sick and tired of everything.

So hard to be in other people's good books.

So Tired!!!

2007-09-03T22:11:00.000+08:00

so many things to accomplished..
so many expectations on me..
so many deadlines for me..
so many these and that..
so many people to entertain..
so many tasks to complete everyday..
so many restrictions..
so many so many so many..

AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

I am not a superwoman..
I am just a simple gal with a simple goal in life..
I just wana earn more money to provide a better life for my kids..

Haiz..

Think I so powerful meh?
Think I really so strong meh?

I am so tired so tired so tired..

HelpPPpPppPppPppPPPppPppPPppPppPpppPPPppPPPppPppPppPppPPppPPpppPp!!!!

Daily Thots

2007-09-02T15:11:00.000+08:00

As I was re-organising my photos in my FS account, I glanced thru all the photos and suddenly realised how time has passed by me at such a quick pace.

It was Dec 05 when I left him.

Looking back at what I had gone thru and what I am going thru now, is life getting better for me?

Career wise I'm definitely getting better, and I've more time to get myself familiarised with work. Of cos, personal time with family and friends becomes lesser. Time spent with Andrea and Adrienne gets lesser, but I know we'll get to enjoy more quality time together when I'm more stable in my career.

Emotionally I'm more stable now as I've a evergreen pillar by my side always. (^o^)

I've to get stronger mentally as I always encountered alot of difficulties at my new workplace. They don't come 1 by 1. They come at a shot and I'm expected to resolve all no matter if it's new / outstanding works. It just seems like I'm the only executive in my department.

Haiz..

I always tell myself. They can stab me or bang me on the wall and make me bleed. But after that, they must call for medic to attend to my wounds and not continue to kick me out to the road and let me get rammed down by cars mah. This will only cause me to die instead of making me suffer more leh.

Er.. Chim right? Must hear and see the way I define it in person then you can understand what I'm trying to say.

hahahahahaha..

Anyway, it's ok. I'll learn it the hard way and it'll make me a better man.

Er.. Better woman I mean. =)

What Are Your Thots On "Jesus Died For You"

2007-08-23T22:38:00.000+08:00

Yoo Hoo~

It's the time of the day again. What time is it? It's blogging time!

hahahahahahaha.. =)

Today is Thursday, which is Alpha course at Wesley Methodist Church.
Before I begin my thoughts for the night, I've to thank Francis for getting me a bible of my own.

Thank you Brother-in-law. =)

Ok. Back to my views and thoughts for tonight.

Tonight's topic for the group sharing session was:
"What are your thoughts when you hear people mentioned to you that Jesus died for you?"

As usual la, I was quiet throughout the session lor. Shy mah, but in fact, scared that they will noticed the big pimple on my left eye (just below my eyebrow). Eeks!

hahahahahahahahaha.. =P

My turn again and my answer was:
Jesus very "Wei Da" lor.

Ok. No right or wrong answer here ah.

It was said that we've to accept Jesus Christ and The Lord as our God because God sent his only Son, Jesus Christ, to come and die for us to atone for our sins. Which God will die for his followers?

Hmmm.. My thoughts ah?

Err.. Jesus Christ is like Tang Sang Zhang (Tripiktra.. or something like that.. I don't know how to spell his name la). Only that Tang Sang Zhang did not die for his followers la. But he went West (on foot and at times ride his horse la) to collect all the scriptures in order to save mankind. Sure some people will ask me how true is this and will say this is only a myth or legend, right? But you people never watch drama series meh? It's always screened like that mah. If these were untrue, how come there is Sun Wukong, Zhu Ba Jie, Zhi Zhu Jing etc?

"Passion of the Christ" is based on true story as what you all will say. Then how come "Xi You Ji (Journey to the West)" cannot be based on true story leh?

Paisey ah. Just that people tend to do a lot of comparisons and have a lot of questions and arguements before they actually convert to be a Christian. I've to make sure my doubts are cleared before I make any decisions on whether to exchange my bucket of water with God and also in turn let go my existing bucket of water. I definitely won't want to follow a religion for the sake of following. I must be sure and this takes time.

Jie must be patient with me ok?

Oh, before I forget but I need to say this out or else I very "buey song". Some people are so rude, no manners. No matter how tired you are, if you attend some course at anywhere. Be it if it's at a church, a temple or even an institution, please don't sleep there ok? Cannot stand the attitude of these people. No manners I still must say again. I'm also very tired after a day at work lor. At most, I'll only keep yawning and move my body here and there at times, but I won't sleep there lor. Next time want to sleep, please go home and sleep. The church is not for you to go there and sleep. Haiz. Young people nowadays don't know what is respect.

Anyway, I've had a very tough week at work recently. Perhaps I should start praying for a better tomorrow?

Hmmm.. Wait la. Slowly la. Some things cannot be rushed.

Anyway, God Loves Us & I Love All Of You~

=)

Peace

2007-08-16T23:01:00.000+08:00

Went to Wesley Methodist Church and attended an Alpha course with Jie & ZQ. Oh! Thank you Jie for paying the $20 for me thou that’s what is left in your wallet today. But, nevermind la. Tomorrow you still can withdraw somemore out from your bank account.

hahahahahahaha..

During the video clip I nearly fell asleep. No choice la because I really felt super tired today.

After the video clip, the people were divided into a few groups. Every group (ours is Group 4) had to do a sharing session within our own group and we had to find a partner and self-introduce ourself to him. The person who introduced me to the group was called Jason. He had no choice but to tell the group what I said to him. My purpose of going there tonight was “tag along for the sake of tag along”.

hahahahahaha…
*faint*

Then came the sharing about your understanding of “Who is Jesus” or perhaps even anything about the video clip (I start to break out in cold sweat le).

Here comes my turn. I told them I have nothing to say but they insisted I say something, or anything. So I said, “Er, the chair is very uncomfortable”.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha…
*pengz*

Jie must have “flipped” after she heard my answer. I cannot help it la because I cannot form my sentences properly when there is a “formation” in the group. Just like during meetings when I had to talk. If everybody is so tense, I will also turned “gan jiong” lor. But if its those kind of meetings when the table is full of papers everywhere and everybody is sitting in a very relaxed mode, I can talk with confidence. It all comes with practice I suppose.

There was someone mentioning about people who are here to be seekers. I am not a seeker. I am just a follower. I follow my heart, I go where my heart wants me to go and do what my heart wants me to do.

I’m not out to seek to understand how Jesus Christ looks like or what he had said or done. I always believe that Jesus Christ exists. I also believe that Kwan Yin Ma, Guan Gong etc does exists as well. There are people who have seen Jesus Christ, but there are also people who had seen Kwan Yin Ma and other Gods. To me, they are like human beings with different surnames. The Chans, Tans, Tengs, Foos are all human beings. Jesus Christ, Kwan Yin Ma, Guan Gong are all God.

I won’t purposely go and seek what is the difference in Christianity or perhaps Taoism.

To me, if I’m the child of God, I don’t have to go and seek for Him. He’ll get his other children to look for me and bring me back to Him. For long before I was conceived by my parents, I was conceived in the mind of God.

Peace will bring me to the place I need to go or to the God to follow.

Frustration Day

2007-08-15T22:14:00.000+08:00

Day 1
Verse to memorise : "Everything got started in Him and finds its purpose in Him"

A penny for your thots?

=========================================================

Actually started the day with a very relaxed mood and told myself today's gonna be a good day.

Haiz..

Sometimes I wonder and wonder and wonder if I've made a right choice so far.

People around me in my current company:
1) Looks friendly but ain't so friendly
2) Looks harmless but full of daggers in pocket ready to stab you
3) Looks hardworking but is a "medium in the snake temple"
4) Looks cooperative but is a "Taiji master" in actual fact
5) Looks like a good coach but in fact teaches you nothing

Know what it feels like after a month in the company?
Feels like I've being kicked into the open sea but was not given any swimming float to help stay above the water nor being taught any swimming or survival skills.

I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THEM!!!

There's no system of how things should be done.
There's not enough support to make the operation go on smoothly.
There're too many mouths given their 2cents worth of opinion (too many cooks spoils the soup).

HELP~

Since morning I had stomach cramps.
I've being surrounded by negative people.
My overloaded boss who grumbles and grumbles.
Can't really blame her cos she's really under alot of stress from her own boss.
She's simply overloaded with work therefore her grumbles become louder and seems to take up more time to finish her each grumble.
But gotta take my hat off her too.
Thou she grumbles alot, she still completes "some" tasks at the end of the day.
Then there is this contractor who did not get any of the 2 tenders called for recently.
He has been grumbling in my ears for days already.
When can he stop it?

Haiz..

I kena nagged and "bombed" the whole day till I became so negative now..

I REALLY FEEL LIKE CRYING OUT LOUD NOW!!!

Cannot stand it already.
Better watch my "Bleach" now.

Daily Thots

2007-08-13T20:28:00.001+08:00

11 Aug 07
Went M'sia (Holiday Plaza) for my hair rebonding..

Watch out... Pretty gal coming... Weet!! Weet!!
12 Aug 07
Went Charis Church with ZQ, Jie & Francis for our 2nd session of the "40days Purpose Driven Life"..
As usual.. I was late again.. (hahahaha)
It was the pastor talking that morning..
Terrible me.. Kept on yawning nonstop..

*slapz*

Next stop.. Lunch at Northpoint with Jie & Francis.
Exciting part coming along..

*drums roll*
drrrrr... drrrr... drrrr.....

Jie & Francis bought me a new hp..
Nokia 6300..

Yeapie!!!!!!!!

I'm walking on sunshine..
Woo Hoo~
I'm walking on sunshine..
Woo Woo Hoo~

10 good reasons why Jie & Francis bought me a new hp:
1) My Nokia N73 after upgrading the software & chng of new sim card still fails me.. I still cant receive or send out all my smses..
2) I've insufficient moni to chng new hp..
3) I've been a very good gal..
4) God is Good..
5) God is Great..
6) Jie is Good..
7) Jie is Great..
8) Francis is Good..
9) Francis is Great..
10) Jie & Francis Loves Me..

Woo Hoo~

Jie also bought me a new facial cleanser cos I complaint of having breakouts..
Tried the cleanser le..
Not bad sial.. (Thou I dunno what brand it is)

So happy when the auntie asked if we were sisters..
She said me & Jie look quite alike..

Yeah~

So long never hear that comment le..
Heex..
I'm a gal who needs constant assurance..

13 Aug 07
In the middle of the nite had very bad blocked runny nose..
One-third of my dustbin was filled with my mucus-filled tissues..

Went to see the doc in the late morning..
Doctor said I've nose allergy..
I've to be on nasal spray & medication for at least 3mths..

haiz..

Took a nap in the afternoon..
Woke up with a terrible thumping headache..
What's wrong man..

Tmr's going to be a tough day..
CEO reached SG fm HKG..
Note sent to all via email/sms/phone call (formal office attire)..

haiz...
I'm a informal gal by default..

Daily Thots

2007-08-06T23:10:00.000+08:00

Tired.. Shag.. Sleepy.. Headache.. Gastric Pain.. Nausea..

Spent almost the whole day at Parkway Parade store..
Thou went to Bugis for a meeting with the landlord..
But after the meeting finished had to return to Parkway Parade store again..
So many outstanding issues there..
All because majority were last minute requests..

Haizz..

Can you people just make up your mind on what you want and what you need??

Shitz man..

After work went for Pilates class @ Amore (Kovan)..
Majority of the time I was laughing away cos I couldn't bend nor stretch like the rest of the gals in the class..
But not that I didn't want to try out the stretches wor..
Its because my hip bone hurts when I did the "ultimate" stretches..
Then halfway thru the class my face felt "hot", my head started to feel heavy and my breathing became heavier..

Haiz..

Guess I'm more of a CardioBlitz gal then a Pilates gal..
But nevertheless..
I've booked for Pilates class next Mon again..
Must try out again and see how..
Cannot lose out to the Aunties..
Grrr....

kekekeke... =P

Aiyoyo.. So late le ah??

Dun care..
At least must watch a few episodes of "Bleach"..

The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren

2007-08-05T21:29:00.000+08:00

Wow.. Subject title v chim rite??

Nvr heared abt this book b4??
Hey u~ Sua Ku Ah??

hahahaha.. oopss.. =P

Years ago, I used to hab a small booklet on this topic..
Given to me by my sister, which is of cos, Joyce.
But its being left at my prev hse..

Being invited to join Jean at Charis Methodist Church for 40 Days of Purpose..
Went with Jie, Francis & ZQ..
Attended the 1st session this morn @ 11plus..
Was v tired & a little bit late for the session..
But I didn't doze off ok??

(not that i wanted to be late wor.. but i worked until past 12am the nite b4.. so i was really v tired ok.. heex.. nuttin but excuses.. but its the truth lor.. hahahaha..)

Don't ask me what I've learnt from the session today..
Sshhh..
Its my secret..
Don't tell you..
Want to know more abt it??
Go attend the session yourself to find out lor..

Its up to me to know..
For you to find out..

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. =P

Jie gave me a "The Faith-Sharing New Testament With The Psalms"..
ZQ says the bible is better than my "Harry Potter" series..
But how to compare leh when ZQ nvr read a single book on "Harry Potter"..

Nonsense him.. hahahaha.. =P

But now I'm stuck in between..
Dunno which one to choose..
I've so many comics waiting to be read..
Lots of new storybooks waiting to be read..
"The Faith-Sharing New Testament With The Psalms" waiting to be read..
"The Purpose Driven Life" waiting to be read..

Oh No~

Which one should i choose 1st leh??
Think I beta continue watching my animation "Bleach"..

Its a v enjoyable animation..
Thumbs up!!

I CAN DO IT!! JUST WAIT & SEE!!

2007-08-03T23:04:00.000+08:00

My boss = negative, grouchy
Me = interest level high, morale level low

Haiz..

My "buddy" is going on “sudden aka last minute” marriage leave next week..
We’ve got a couple of projects calling for tender next week..
All he has left for me is loads of unfinished work to clear next week..
Yet he has not given me any form of guidance to let me live thru next week..

Next week..
Survivor series..
Stay tuned to Channel “G”..

“G” for Gracie..

My boss is getting more & more grouchy..
My boss is getting more & more negative..

How I fear she’ll give up & just tender her resignation..
I’m already trying very hard to learn everything the hard way..
I’m learning the ropes by getting “arrowed” by countless mgrs..
“Lost of blood due to multiple wounds” left me so weak in the body & mind..

I don’t care how you people see me..
I’ll prove to all of you that this job is not only meant for a guy..
This is now MY JOB & I CAN DO IT BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU!!

So much for shouting out loud my grievances..
So tiring..
Farting also won’t make me so tired..
Might as well give a good & loud fart now..

PROOT!!! PROOT!!! PROOT!!!

Oh no..
Something seems to have leaked out from my asshole..
Hmmm..

(^_^) *blush*

Daily Thots

2007-08-02T20:51:00.000+08:00

wrkin life has been very very stressful for me..
alot of problems have arisen recently..
i really start to query myself abt my capabilities..
is it me or is it the ppl involved in the project that causes the problems??

haiz..

sometimes i just wished i am as capable as my sister..
she's so capable and has such a good career..
its all because she had studied hard when she was young..

but there's nuttin i can do or chng abt my past..
all i can do is make the best out of everything i have now..

haiz..

so much easier said than done..
just like farting..

Msg In A Pic

2007-07-28T01:01:00.000+08:00

after a tiring day at work..
decided to check out my Friendster late at nite..

had a new message..
being invited to view someone's pics..

a family photo without my kids..
wonder when was it taken..

noticed a photo that caught my eye..
someone that looks like "her" hugging him in the pic..

any meaning in it??
any message trying to be conveyed here??

*lost for words*

~SmiLes~

2007-07-25T22:59:00.000+08:00

My Comfort Zone

2007-07-24T22:59:00.000+08:00

Mizuno Run [22.07.07]

2007-07-23T22:45:00.000+08:00

I loved this picture alot...

Me & My Lovely Sister, Joyce.

Thots Of The Day

2007-07-23T22:42:00.000+08:00

Stress level has risen a lot in this new job. Everything is so brand new to me. Contractors, colleagues, job scope, etc. A lot of things were not properly done up in the past. Now, I’ve to “scoop the shit”.

Pathetic~

Is this what I wanted? I can’t possible turn back now, can I?

After a site meeting at Compass Point today, I took a cab from there to Parkway Parade. The taxi uncle drove a much longer route. I sensed the difference as the route was so much different from last night when I took a cab from home to Parkway Parade. I called and told Roy about it and he helped me lodge a complaint to the call centre. Then he asked me to return call to Winnie and let her know more details. I called and when I spoke to Winnie, she asked “You are Grace, Roy’s wife?” Without much hesitation, I replied “Yes.”

Oh no! What did I do? Why do I still admit to others that I am his wife? And why did he still acknowledge me as his wife?

Surprisingly, I didn’t feel angry. What kind of feelings I had at that time? It’s still a question mark as I can’t recall it now.

I had quite a long chat with Roy today. He made me laughed my blues away for the moment.

Haiz…

Why am I still so attached to him? Why do I feel a sense of comfort after talking to him?

I doubt it is the love I still have for him that makes me feel happy talking to him. It’s the comfort he brings to me as a friend. As a friend, he does know how to cheer me up even though he is also feeling tired after driving for so many hours on the road today.

Perhaps he is also the reason why I can’t really commit into another relationship (because I fear failure).

Ok! What’s over is over, no point bringing up the past again. But I’ll very much want to keep him in my life forever, as a very close friend of mine.

Outing [15 Jul 07]

2007-07-18T18:46:00.000+08:00

Movie Plot
As his fifth year at Hogwarts approaches, 15-year-old Harry Potter is in full-blown adolescence, complete with regular outbursts of rage, a nearly debilitating crush, and the blooming of a powerful sense of rebellion. It's been yet another infuriating and boring summer with the despicable Dursleys, this time with minimal contact from our hero's non-Muggle friends from school.

Watched the movies with ZQ, Sean, Rina, Dean, Catherine, Ah Teck, Xiao Ping and Xing Xing at Lido.

They were a bit disappointed with the movies as they expected more ‘fighting’ scenes. I didn’t expect much from this movie as I thought it’ll most probably be like the book, very ‘lengthy’.

Overall, not a bad show. Quite hilarious at times. But 2 hours plus show, my back hurts man.

Went to Sake Sushi for dinner. We ate like some ‘hungry cannibals’. (hahahaha)

Only took 50% of the food (the plates) that we ate. The remaining 50% on the table, remains unseen. (heex)

Went to Dembsy Road for some drinks with ZQ, Sean, Rina, Dean, Ziao Ping and Xing Xing. We ordered carrot cake and berry cheese cake. Yummy! I liked the berry cheese cake a lot. The cheese melts in your mouth. Wooh~